Amaphupha anokuba yimbonakaliso yethu iimvakalelo nzulu, uloyiko kunye nokungaqiniseki. Ukuphupha malunga nokungathembeki yenye yamava anokusishiya nawo iimvakalelo zokuxhalaba kunye nokungaqiniseki ekuvukeni. Nangona kunjalo, la maphupha akasoloko ethetha ukuba kukho ukungcatsha ngokwenene ebomini. Amaxesha amaninzi, eyakho ukutolika Inxulumene ngakumbi namathandabuzo ethu, uloyiko kunye neengxabano zangaphakathi kunobudlelwane bethu njengesibini.
Ukuze siqonde intsingiselo yala maphupha, kubalulekile hlalutya zonke iinkcukacha. Ngaba nguwe owenza ubufebe? Ngaba iqabane lakho ukukopela kuwe? Uziva njani ephupheni kwaye xa uvuka? Ezi zikhokelo zinokukunceda ukuba uqonde ngcono ukuba i-subconscious yakho izama ukukuxelela ntoni.
Kuthetha ukuthini ukuphupha ngokungathembeki?
Intsingiselo yokuphupha malunga nokungathembeki inokuhluka ngokuxhomekeke kumntu kunye nabo imeko yeemvakalelo. Kwabanye, olu hlobo lwephupha lungabonakalisa ukungakhuseleki kubudlelwane, ngelixa kwabanye kunokunxulumana amava adlulileyo okanye uloyiko lobuqu.
Ngokutsho kwesazi segraphopsychologist uClara Tahoces, xa siphupha ukuba asithembekanga, oku kunokubonisa imvakalelo ukungoneliseki okanye imfuno engafezekanga kubudlelwane bethu. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukuba siphupha ukuba iqabane lethu lisiqhatha, oku kungabonakalisa eyethu uloyiko lokulahlekelwa kumntu obalulekileyo ebomini bethu.
Ukutolikwa ngokomxholo wephupha
Intsingiselo echanekileyo iya kuxhomekeka kwimeko apho iphupha likhula khona. Nazi ezinye ukutolika okuqhelekileyo:
- Ukuba uphupha ukuba awuthembekanga: Isenokubonisa ukuziva unetyala ngento oyenzileyo kulwalamano okanye kwenye indawo yobomi bakho, ingekuko ukuba buhlungu.
- Ukuba uphupha ukuba iqabane lakho likuqhatha: Isenokubonisa ukungazithembi okanye uloyiko lokulahlwa oqhubeka nalo kumava angaphambili.
- Ukuba uphupha ukuba iqabane lakho likuqhatha nomntu omaziyo: Kusenokuthetha ukuba uziva usoyikiso oluthile okanye ukhuphiswano lwaloo mntu, kwanokuba alukho ngemibandela yothando. Olu hlobo lwephupha lunokuba neenguqulelo ezininzi.
- Ukuba ephupheni kukho ukusabela okunzulu kosizi okanye umsindo: Kusenokwenzeka ukuba kukho iingxabano ezingasonjululwanga kubudlelwane ekufuneka uzisombulule.
Ukuphupha ukuba ungqina ukungathembeki
Ukuba ephupheni ubona omnye umntu engathembekanga (umzekelo, umhlobo okanye ilungu lentsapho), oku kunokumela:
- Ukoyika ukungcatshwa:Ungase ungamthembi umntu ebomini bakho woyike ukuba azokulimaza.
- Imiba yokuthenjwa ngokubanzi:Ukuba ukhe waqhathwa okanye wangcatshwa kwixesha elidlulileyo, kunokwenzeka ukuba i-subconscious yakho ivuselela ezo mvakalelo.
- Uqikelelo lweengxaki zabanye abantu: Ngamanye amaxesha, ezi ntlobo zamaphupha azikho ngawe ngqo, kodwa malunga neenkxalabo malunga nobomi babanye.
Kutheni siphupha malunga nokungathembeki?
Kukho izizathu ezininzi zokuba kutheni bethu ngqalelo inokusizisela ezi ntlobo zamaphupha. Ezinye zezona zinto zixhaphakileyo zezi:
- Ukungakhuseleki ngokweemvakalelo: Ukuba uye watyhubela amava anzima ngaphambili, uloyiko lwakho lusenokuzibonakalisa ephupheni lakho.
- Ukungathembeki kubudlelwane: Ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba iqabane lakho liye laba kude ngokweemvakalelo, olu loyiko lunokubonakaliswa kumaphupha akho.
- Uloyiko lokulahlwa: Isenokunxulunyaniswa nokwenzakala kwasebuntwaneni okanye ukuzithemba.
- Iingxaki zonxibelelwano: Ukuba kukho iingxabano kubudlelwane obungakhange buxoxwe ngokuvulekileyo, ezi zinokubonakala zifanekisela amaphupha.
Imbono kaFreud ngamaphupha okukrexeza
I-Psychoanalyst uSigmund Freud wayekholelwa ukuba amaphupha abonisa iminqweno efihliweyo nabangekho zingqondweni. Kwincwadi yakhe ethi "Ukutolikwa kwamaphupha", uFreud ukhankanya ukuba ukuphupha malunga nokungathembeki kunokunxulumana iimfuno zeemvakalelo okanye iminqweno efihlakeleyo engazange ibonakale ngokucacileyo.
UFreud ukwabonisa ukuba la maphupha asenokuphenjelelwa yimeko yenkcubeko nentlalontle, ekubeni ukungathembeki Sisihloko esenza ixhala kunye netyala kubantu abaninzi.. Esi sihloko siye saphononongwa kuncwadi. kwaye inokunika ukuqonda ngakumbi kubuntsonkotha beemvakalelo ezibandakanyekayo.
Indlela yokujongana nala maphupha?
Ukuba ezi ntlobo zamaphupha ziphindaphindiwe kwaye zibangele uxhalaba, kuyacetyiswa hlalutya indlela oziva ngayo kubudlelwane bakho nakubomi bakho ngokubanzi. Ezinye izenzo ezinokukunceda ziquka:
- Thetha neqabane lakho: Ukuba uziva ungakhuselekanga, ukwabelana ngoloyiko lwakho kunokuqinisa ubuhlobo.
- Ukuzivandlakanya: Zibuze ukuba ngaba kukho iinkalo zobomi bakho ezibangela uxinzelelo okanye amathandabuzo.
- Funa inkxaso yobuchwephesha: Ugqirha unokukunceda ukutolika la maphupha kwaye usebenze kuko nakuphi na ukungakhuseleki ngokweemvakalelo.
Ukuphupha ngokungathembeki akuthethi ukuba iqabane lakho liyakuqhatha okanye ufuna ukungathembeki. La maphupha aqhelekile iimbonakaliso zeemvakalelo zethu, uloyiko namaxhala angaphakathi. Isitshixo sokutolika la maphupha si cazulula umxholo, iimvakalelo zethu kunye nemeko yethu yobuqu. Nangona zinokuphazamisa, zinokuba nethuba loku hlalutya Uziva njani kubudlelwane bakho? kwaye ulungise nakuphi na ukungakhuseleki okanye imiba yonxibelelwano enokuthi ibekhona.
